Friday, July 22, 2016

Dear First Order

Dear First Order,
     After reading Star Wars: Bloodline and knowing who and where you came from, I'd like to tell you everything wrong with your plan.
     Firstly, I'd like to complain about the way you treated General Leia. She couldn't help her heritage and you knew that; and long had even the Empire honored her family line- both her biological family and her adopted parents. You really could've had an ally there- or you could've at least gotten rid of her in a nicer way. She was kind of wanting to disappear with Han and Luke anyways, so what you did in calling her names was childish and pointless.
     Also, after rewatching the movies, I'd like to note how slow the stormtroopers were in their bulky armor. Instead of reusing their design, you should have scrapped the whole thing and started anew. Very bad planning.
     Also, working with Force wielders? Bad move. Voldemort would have known better! That's an accident waiting to happen. We all know what happened with the Skywalkers and the Empire- you just invited another one to work with you, you numbskulls! 
     And on top of that, you pretty much made a bigger version of the Death Star. Oh, you're so creative. Here the metaphorical sarcasm sauce dripping off of my words? That's because you aren't creative. Guess what Luke Skywalker did to the last two superweapons? Guess what he's gonna do to all the new ones you guys are scheming up in those diabolical little heads of yours?
     In short, you are doomed to fail.
                                                                                       Maraya Nightfly, Pilot of Flying Ice 


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